Oh god, I miss you so much.

As days gone by... Without a single text or call from you. It takes a piece at a time of me day by day. It kills me inside. I miss you so much that this thing that's going on right now, us not meeting everyday like we used to in school back then it's pulling me down in life. I miss you so much that I'd do anything to come and meet you, to see that sparkle in your eye, that soft fair skin, that unique scent of yours and the smile and laughter you always gave me when we go out. I miss you so much, noona.

A day out with them zombies

We decided to have an outing for zombies and their respective partners to come alongside as well to get to know one another. Well, I got "k" twice I dont know why probably bcos the whole lot of us left first and walk towards marina square, you were closing in towards city hall, just few stations away. I supposed I should've just waited for you at city hall and then make our way there. I know you dont like to walk alone even though youre kinda used to be alone and independent. I know you never liked doing things alone. You always do stuffs confirm got teman. Well, here is a picture of us.

A day at the library.

Honestly I never thought that we would go out again, just us. Okay so we first went to Marina Square to find llaollao yoghurt, you wanted to try it so badly. It looks appealing, so why not join the fun. To find this llaollao, we circled the whole building and only find the shop about half an hour later. A day spent with you has always been amazing day for me. Although my hopes on getting you is lower, but my feelings for you still remains. I just cant get over the fact that I'm still in love with you. Anyway, after done studying we took a detour to farrer park and had our dinner there. Initially we alighted at little india station, then we realised we were at the wrong station that's when we hop on the train and dropped at the next station (belo gila day for us) When we're heading home, I decided to teman you until you board your train first, I wanna make sure you're safe. Thank you for going out with me, Noranishah.

Stuck again.

I really dont know what to do now. Why are you being like this? In front of the rest, you show that we are absolutely fine with each othed. Behind them, you need me you find me. When you don't need me, you disregard me from your life. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME. The moment when I've decided to move on and try to forget about you, the very next day DAMMIT YOU STILL WANT ME TO ACCOMPANY YOU TO GO MEET MR LIM FOR YOUR S&W MAKE UP CLASS WHEN THERE'S MUJ OR ZAKI TO ACCOMPANY YOU. YOU INTENTIONALLY CHOSE ME TO ACCOMPANY YOU. WHY...WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME. YOU'RE KILLING ME SOFTLY WITH YOUR ACTIONS, YOUR WORDS, everything..... Why am I even being so kind towards you when you have hurt me so much.....WHY. Why do I still bother about you so much when you dont. Why do I still text you to tell you to go to school every 5.30am in the morning when you delibrately stopped replying my morning texts. 😔 I was so determined to leave you and then this happened. Everytime I look at you, I still fall for you over and over again...

Toughest nut to crack ever

I really really REALLY cant seem to find a logical explanation of your irregular mood/behaviour towards me. You're the weirdest girl I've ever met in my entire life. If you were a board game I'm pretty sure my chances of winning against you is like 1:100. I still dont get why I'm chasing after you even though you have mentally killed me at times trying to figure you out. I guess there tonnes of homework for me to do about you. You are one of a kind. #OOAK

#RayaRayaZombiesSkema

Pandai je korang eh lagi lagi shidah "siapa duduk depan kena amek selfie tau dengan driver" ishh budak ni nak kena kan orang memang nombor satu. I swear to god Nora, you are really the biggest challenge in my entire life that I have ever encountered. I need Allah to consistently give me strength to win your heart, to always fight for you, to always never lose hope in you, to always have the fire burning to chase after you and most importantly to crave for your attention even if you give me the slightest bit. The thing is, there was a seat right next to you closer to the door but you chose to sit right next to me instead and leave the door seat unoccupied.... I sense that you want me but at the same time you push me everytime I try to get close to you. You're always shy that's the most cutest thing about you, tomato girl.

Don't give in, keep fighting.

Alhamdulillah, our conversations are all back to normal. I hope it stays this way forever. You're still the one that I want. In shaa Allah you'll be mine, amin.

A hope that never runs out.

You may not know this but I have always been berdoa-ing about us after each solat. If you're destined to be mine, make our love and bond stronger and closer. If you were never meant to be, make me steonger to accept and redha of Your decisions, oh Allah. 😔

Change.

You're so different now. You changed. We changed. The atmosphere that surrounded us changed. What made it change, I still dont know yet. I've been observing your behaviour lately and nothing makes sense. I am still trying figure you out. You're starting to go back to your lazy ways and that's something that worries me. You change so suddenly and, like as if someone poisoned your mind to keep a distance from me. What did I do wrong? Oh Allah, if this is just a test for me, give me strength to endure this challenge and give me faith that I'll still pray to you to seek help. I need the old you back Noranishah bte Mohd Riduwan.

The truth.

Almost everyone of my zombies knows about you today, except for you. I'm certain that you've already gotten my hints for you a few times. I'm sure of that. I tahu I ni bukan manusia sempurna cuma hamba Allah yang biasa saje. Tapi I harap sangat supaya kita dapat bersama satu hari nanti in shaa Allah. Its time for me to confess it to you soon, when that day comes I have to be ready to talk to you.

Hints or just plain assumptions of mine?

You've been showing me hints or at least maybe I thought they are actually hints from you showing that our feelings are mutual? I really am confused or maybe I am just afraid to advance to the next phase. I'm pretty sure you've seen my actions for you, me tryna guide this relationship to a different level instead of just good friends. I am certain of that. Maybe we're both are just too shy to tell each other bout our feelings. Recently, I've been praying to Allah to show me a sign, I think I have found my answer. (: You keep showing me that you want to be with me, likewise I've been doing the same to you. Ya Allah, give me strength to confess to you as I feel that the right time will come anytime soon, amin.

Dear god.

I hate seeing you sad like this. I empathize your current situation now. How I wish I am next to you right now to hug you and make you feel better. The only thing I could do now is just pray to Allah that you will be stronger to face obstacles given by Him. Ya Allah, please look after Nora. She needs your guidance.